A Year in Review and a Little Mickey Mouse

I've been struggling to write this post for over a week. That's probably not typical of a parent when thinking of their child's first birthday, but since when was anything about Layla's birth typical?! The past year has been amazing and challenging and heartbreaking.

I have absolutely loved every moment I have spent with Layla. She is so very special and precious. Watching her grow and learn has been amazing! I had no idea the joy that came with mommyhood. I could not ask for a better job! At the same time, being a mom is HARD WORK! I have never appreciated my own mom more! Things are obviously not as difficult as they were last October when I was recovering from surgery and dealing with a brand new baby, but there are new challenges. Every new phase that she goes through brings new learning experiences for Layla, Matthew and I. Raising a child is an ever changing adventure.

At the same time that I am thankful for all of these wonderful experiences that the past year has brought, I have also spent a lot of time thinking about the day she was born. Things just went so terribly wrong and I feel robbed in so many ways. Not only did I lose my ability to ever carry another baby, but I also missed out on so much in the first few hours, days and weeks of Layla's life. I didn't get to hold her after her birth, we didn't get that special time together to bond and I didn't get to care for her the way I desperately wanted to. I find it all very frustrating, even a year later. Another aspect that is frustrating is that after thinking long and hard about our family, Matthew and I agree that we would like to have more children, but it won't come easy or cheap. We will have to jump through incredible hoops and pay more than I could have ever imagined to expand our family. It was a hard pill to swallow and I struggle with that fact every day.

Though these things did happen and it can't be changed, I try not to dwell on it. I am so amazingly thrilled with our life with Layla and and I could not ask for more in my husband and daughter. They are most important to me and my life would simply not be complete without them!

So drama and emotion aside, Layla's first birthday was spectacular! My mom, step-dad and sister and Matt's parents all came out to celebrate with us. On her actual birthday, we had cupcakes and opened some presents. Layla had her first taste of chocolate (and sugar for that matter) and loved it! Then the following weekend we had a Mickey Mouse Clubhouse themed party. It was lots of friends, family and Mickey Mouse! Layla handled it all pretty well considering she was going without a nap...risky business with a child that still REQUIRES two naps a day. She opened her presents and played with the kids and of course there was the cake! Basically, she learned that birthdays = delicious frosting! The whole day was a lot of fun and I was so proud of my little pumpkin. She's just growing up (into a beautiful little person) way too fast!

Kindermusik, It's All the Rage!

It has definitely been a busy end of Summer and beginning of Fall, but what I've been busy with, I could not tell you because honestly, I've done a whole lot of nothing! Well, of course, besides that whole child-rearing job I've got going on.

Layla is becoming more of toddler and less of a baby every single day and it is hard to keep up, not to mention completely heartbreaking! She is now cruising along furniture and clapping her hands. She also waves at every person and animal that crosses her path. Her blue eyes and long eyelashes draw comments from everyone she meets as well and I think she really likes the attention. She has become somewhat of a picky eater but loves just about every dairy product she is allowed to eat, specifically cheese (she is totally our kid)! Layla has also started saying Dada and for a while that was the only thing she would say (to Matt's delight, I'm sure). We still have not heard even a hint of other words but that's ok, I'm enjoying the time that I have left before I start hearing "no" thrown back at me :)

We recently began attending Kindermusik classes and for those who don't know it is basically just a Mommy and Me class where you sing and dance and act silly with your little one in front of a bunch of other mom's and babies who are singing and dancing and being silly. Layla has never spent much time with other kids her age so it was really fun to watch her interact with a room full of babies. She was pretty shy at first and did not want to get off my lap. She just sat quietly and observed everyone else. As the weeks have gone on she has opened up a bit and tries to pet every kid in the room. She is pretty funny and seems to really enjoy the class. My favorite part of course is where the mom's get to lay down for an entire song and the babies can do there own thing. While all of the other babies are crawling all over the place or attacking each other, my sweet angel just lays her head down on my chest and cuddles, it's too adorable!

The only downside to this new experience for Layla is we have now entered the world of snot-nosed kids. Every week of class has resulted in a new virus for Layla and our family. The first week brought roseola for Layla so she was pretty miserable for a few days with fever and then a rash. Once she was over that, I picked up a cold in class and of course passed it on to Layla. Matt has it now, just in time for his birthday...yay for baby classes!

Other than that all is well with the pumpkin. Her first birthday is right around the corner so I've spent all of my time prepping for the party, but more on that later...